12/01/2016

Exhausted?

Christmas isn’t even here yet, and I wonder how many of us are already worn out.

I look at my own life. Sometimes I don’t know what I’m doing or why I’m doing it. Sometimes I look back and think, “I hope my motive was right.” But honestly, I don’t know. I was just moving, reacting, living.

And then it starts to creep up on me . . .

“Tom, everything you touch is a mess. Everywhere you go, you get lost. Everything you hope, you screw up.”

Maybe I’m exaggerating. Maybe I’m just tired. But, maybe I’m right.

Maybe I try and try and try . . . and always fail.

Maybe I’ve lost the plot, the narrative, the map, the way. Where was I going? What was I doing? Did I really want to start a war in my house over a dirty floor? Is that what my life has amounted to? What’s going on here? I can’t figure myself out sometimes, as hard as I try.

Can I tell you how grateful I am for the Church Calendar? If I’m left to always carve out my own path or destiny, I will fail. But the Church tells me, “It’s Advent 2. John the Baptist is here. Come.”

I need that, desperately. I can’t figure everything out. My own hopes are iffy. My own purposes unclear. I need a map, a way.

The Church says, “Enter in. Here is a certain and sure purpose and hope. lt’s Advent. Then Christmas. Then Epiphany. Then Lent. Then Easter. Enter in and follow the life of the Lord Jesus Christ. Watch him be born, live, die, and rise. Live with him. And let him be your way.”

Thank God!
I need to go to Church!
I need Advent!

Tom+